As the elderly grapple with aging, they seek companionship to help them confront the relentless passage of time, finding comfort in not facing it alone.

MEMORIES FADE, bones and muscles weaken, and loved ones are lost—aging is a profound and challenging journey, marked by visible and invisible changes. Growing old is tied with uncertainties and significant life changes, often leading to feelings of loneliness and limitation.

These experiences underscore the challenges faced by the elderly, making companionship all the more crucial. While some navigate the later stages of life alone, others seek support from those around them to ease these trials.

Tuloy po kayo

Lola Constantina*, an 89-year-old mother of three and a grandmother of five, has devoted much of her life to caring for her children and grandchildren. She has been their family’s pillar of strength and love throughout their lives.

A testament to Lola Constantina’s nurturing presence is one of her granddaughters, Mica*, who always happily shares anecdotes and stories of how her lola’s unwavering support shaped her life and made her childhood special.

Initially, the warmth of those gestures wasn’t always easy to see. Lola Constantina’s stern demeanor once made young Mica hesitant to get close. Over time, however, her lola softened, becoming someone she could share laughs with—her lighthearted, childlike spirit enduring even with age.

Unfortunately, the once-frequent conversations and gossip sessions between Mica and her grandmother have significantly dwindled since Lola Constantina suffered a stroke during the pandemic. This incident made her weaker and strained her communication more, altering the dynamic of their cherished interactions.

Despite the challenges, with the support of her family, friends, and the elderly communities she has been a part of, Lola Constantina has found meaningful ways to stay engaged and connected, bringing her a renewed sense of purpose and joy.

Kasama, kaibigan, kaagapay

For many years, Lola Constantina has been deeply engaged in elderly communities across Menukha, Malabon, and Malate. Often accompanying her grandmother, Mica has witnessed Lola Constantina enjoying activities such as eating, drawing, and painting with other senior citizens.

As they recognize the challenges of losing friends as one ages, Lola’s family is committed to supporting her leisure activities. “We want her to have the opportunity to make new friends… Kahit na matanda na siya (even if she is already old),” Mica shares.

Above all, Mica describes Lola’s involvement in these activities as a communal and collective effort, emphasizing how they come together to support each other. She values the companionship and sense of belongingness these group activities provide, even through simple conversations or ‘chikas.’

As much as she appreciates the joy these engagements bring to her lola, Mica also makes a concerted effort to support her grandmother in any possible way, which she believes to be the best thing any grandchildren could give to their grandparents. She acknowledges that understanding the struggles of elderly people can be challenging from a distance, but she emphasizes the importance of maintaining a strong family support system while they are still together.

Habang nandito pa ako

The deep-seated cultural value of respecting and caring for one’s elders is a cornerstone of familial relationships. Lola Constantina, who has devoted much of her life to her family, now receives the honor and care she deserves from them in return. Her family’s commitment to her reflects not merely a responsibility, but a reflection of mutual respect and support.

Just as Lola Constantina watched her grandchild grow, Mica has also witnessed her grandmother lose longtime friends, leaving her lola feeling lonely without those trusted companions. This deep emotional connection drives Mica to always check in on Lola. Despite their generational differences, she tries to fill the gap left by the absence of her grandmother’s peers.

“Hindi naman ganoon kahirap maging mabuting apo (It’s not that hard to be a good grandchild),” Mica relays.

The simple truth is that supporting the elderly lies not in grand gestures but in simple acts of time and patience. It is the small, meaningful moments—the time spent together, the ears one lends, the moments of laughter, and the genuine care—that become cherished gifts, outweighing any regrets.

Ultimately, aging is inevitable, but it does not have to be a journey of loneliness or isolation. While daunting, it becomes profoundly meaningful with solid support systems, including not just one’s immediate family but also the community they are part of.

By embracing these roles and understanding the unique concerns and perspectives of the elderly, their families, friends, and communities can transform their world into one that is rich with shared joy and love, creating a compassionate environment that transcends the boundaries of time and age.

*Editor’s Note: The interviewees’ names have been changed at their request to protect their identity and privacy.