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ayap@theguidon.com

Much has been said about the goodness typhoon Ondoy had brought about in the Filipino people: local trademarks such as the spirit of ‘bayanihan’, resilience, and the like. I was there, I had seen how people could be so kind as to give time and strength for others. In the midst of this global recession, people around the world have been showing random acts of kindness to fellow people despite their apparent need.

Despite this renewal, however, we tend to let our guards down. We may have seen and heard of extraordinarily kind people who strive to better other peoples’ lives. But we tend to forget that equally misguided people exist as well, deceivers who thrive, especially in these times of calamity and political maneuvering. More than ever, money is in demand.

And I had to learn it the hard way.

Just a few weeks ago, right after the semester ended, I was tricked by a swindler right inside my very own home. I don’t know how I let myself be deceived by this ‘dugo-dugo gang.’ Maybe I was feeling carefree and in a good mood that the semestral break had finally set in, or maybe I was so used to the way things in my life was going on. And then that fated phone call came.

It is difficult for me to retell the story in full detail. A woman called me at home, told me that my mother and her friends got into an accident, and that the wealthy, influential man they crashed into was suing them into prison. They even had me talk to a sobbing woman whom I thought was my mother. They said I needed to show them some financial capability, that we could pay for the damages and the medical fees. They wanted the matter to be private, so I was prohibited from telling anyone, or else they would not help my mother.

I ended up going by myself to a shady place where I would give them the “evidence.” That night, I ended up losing a lot to a group of people who I thought would help my mother. It turned out everything was a hoax. The worst thing was believing that the voice on the other line was really my mother.

I was delirious. I had never felt so worse in my life. I remember walking back to the car of the person who picked me up in tears, my vision blurred from confusion, and my walking crooked as the people who led me there.

Days later, I still felt the trauma of the memories still clearly forged in my mind. I cried and cried and speculated on what I could have done. It was an act of stupidity and carelessness. I could not stop blaming myself for being so gullible and not knowing better. I asked myself, “What am I doing, studying at Ateneo, when I could not figure out such an obvious ploy?”

The incident is still painful to recall, but now I can say that I definitely know better. I will never be the same person I was before this happened, but thanks to the many people, my family especially, who have supported me after, I will not end in bitterness.

This experience left me with a certain trauma, and caused me to see the world in a darker light. But now I am more wary as my vision clears. Although I still possess some hate and resentment, the kindness of others helps me recover, and restores the belief that the world is still (generally) a good place.